My Husband Gets Angry All The Time For No Reason
Wondering why your husband gets angry all time with no obvious reason?. Being disruptive is one of the toxic qualities but there is one more quality which women tend to find hardest to tolerate and that is being angry all the time. We women are by nature easy-going, the worst of ours is the one who thinks by screaming and scolding they can make things around them better. Also, Some of us are unlucky enough to found them sharing beds with a guy who is always like a fully loaded gun and you can hear a blow at any minute, Living in this state can also cause some serious problems for the children living the house.
Well just like a loaded gun you can also stay safe from that type of behavior if you handle it carefully. Most men have anger issues but let’s discuss the causes of these issues, I will be sharing my perspective with you, which is indeed a guy’s perspective on a guy’s problem. It’s not mansplaining its just men understand men better.
Your ego can make it difficult to even sort out normal problems with your husband, so please to understand his anger you first need to be humble and patient enough. Only that way you can focus on the mental and emotional problem of your husband and maybe can do something to cure it.
You have to make your vision broad as its a mutual process If you are ready to achieve this new perspective, follow the guidelines given below.
Why my husband gets angry all the time for no reason?
If you wonder why always your husband is nagging you even when you aren’t doing anything wrong. You may find some suitable reasons for it from the reasons given below:
- Hypogonadism (Low Testosterone): The lack of testosterone is as bad as the excess of testosterone is, most men in their 30s face this problem but It often gets undiagnosed because there is a misconception that only people who take steroids or have high testosterone level are prone to anger issues but in the real men with hypogonadism have more mood swings than a woman on periods.
- Depression (Low Serotonin): It’s not the worst stage of depression, it is more of a hormone problem caused by bad eating and sleeping habits. To maintain the serotonin levels, you should work on having a nice 7-8 hours of regular sleep.
- Too Much Stress: In this also a hormone named Cortisol is involved, If there is a lack or excess of this hormone which is excreted in mostly men due to stress over work then he can easily have heart problems, also anger issues for sure. Make sure he eats properly because stress eating is also one of the major problems.
- Toxic Masculinity: Due to the societal pressure many men are trapped into this thing called being a man that no matter what only he has to double his income or take all of the financial pressure. All of this results in men having anxiety and depression issues because they feel like nothing is in their hands anymore and to feel control of the anger tantrums are formed.
- Unsorted Emotional Problems: The more men repress their emotions and feelings the more they become angry as those problems come out as anger outbursts.
How to cope with an angry husband?
In these types of situations, It is really important to stay calm because even the minor argument can end up in a very bad situation. If both husband and wife are angry then they should avoid any type of communication and firstly, they should do something to lighten themselves. Also, these are some things to follow, If you want to cope with your angry husband.
- Be Fearless: It doesn’t mean you have to fight or even do something close to that, you just have to be not afraid of anger. The sudden Loud pitch of him shouldn’t make you uncomfortable because that loud pitch is similar to a baby crying rather than a lion roaring. After all, the real power doesn’t demand anger.
- Review your actions: It takes two for tango and the same as that there almost a mistake that wives make which in return triggers anger. Wives often ignore this thing and mostly start talking about the past mistakes of their husbands, just because they don’t recognize their mistakes. You should be always careful with your wording because most men are softer on the inside then they are hard on the outside. If you can’t find any of your mistakes then you should try to tell him about where he got you wrong or misunderstood you.
- Keep in mind that anger is a habit: Some of the women also get humble that even when their husband is being angry about something insignificant, these women take the blame on themselves. You should never do that because this will assure them that they can be angry at anything. He should realize his own mistakes and flaws.
- Don’t be a control freak: The only thing you can control is how you reflect on his anger. When some women try to change their husbands, they end up making it worse because a change acceptance is needed. As long as your husband doesn’t feel like changing you can’t do anything about his anger.
- You aren’t the only one suffering: Like any other negative process in this process too both persons will be affected. This disruptive process will leave intangible scars to both of them. So you should realize that he ain’t getting any benefit by making you suffer instead he is effected more as his spiritual and physical health is compromised because guilt is something that comes after the anger and it makes a man feel weak and he anguishes this situation.
- Anger is for weak: There are many old sayings which tells us that being angry or uttering spiteful words aren’t the signs of power. I have read it once that “Sound always comes from empty spaces”, Mechanism of the drum also works like this because it has nothing in itself. So, It will be a good question that what things trigger that behavior.
- Use Humor as much as you can: Even in the most heated situations humor plays to be the best tactic. A laugh can make the brain stop and think that what beautiful moments he is wasting by indulging into something which he doesn’t even want. Also, I’m disclosing one of my favorite jokes, “When God created man, Man asked God what are the most powerful things you have given me, The God said: ” I have given you a penis for the welfare of the world so you can re-produce and given you a brain so you can have the ability to think and make some great things/decisions. The Man became so grateful to God and then God said There is one weakness too and that is blood won’t flow to both of them at the same time.” 🙂
Right from childhood men are told to be hardcore, They are told to not cry and these insecurities are pretty much in every other man. So, whenever you become emotional and cry in front of your husband, those deep-rooted insecurities tell him to not console you rather become angry and furious. Whenever your husband is sounding rude make sure that is this rudeness coming from the guy who loves you or his deep-rooted insecurities.
How to deal with a husband who has temper issues
- Don’t charge up the situation: The worst thing you can do is to become the power supply to his anger, the more you charge him up by saying things to him the less there are chances that both of you have mediation in your situation. Indeed this anger won’t stay long enough but the remarks you will give him while this heated debate will hurt you till your last breath.
- Be Patient: Always keep the 20 mins period in your mind because no matter what he is angry on, It will be gone in some time and when he is calm and using his brain then tell him about his unnecessary anger. When a person is furious you can never make them believe that they are being furious because in the back of their mind it is an appropriate reaction to the things and for them to find out the real thing their mind should be in the calm state.
- Draw your Boundaries: Most people don’t do this because sometimes they are too optimistic that they can tolerate almost anything and sometimes they are too pessimistic that they don’t even tolerate a single word. So it’s better to warn your husband when he is not angry that these are the lines you shouldn’t cross no matter what, by doing this It will be easier to co-exist with each other.
- Be concerned with your time: As not all the arguments worth your time like why food isn’t cooked that well? or why didn’t you woke him up on time? or why do kids make noise?, You should be the one avoiding any argument which will just a waste of time now and even after that when you will try to make him realize that it was wrong. So you should be choosy in that and do minimum arguments as you can.
- Do not lower self-esteem: The man who loved you for many years indeed deserves your effort to make things right but he doesn’t deserve to insult you even if he has anger issues or not. You should make this clear by telling him that your self-esteem is something not to play with and that you also respect him and would never say something that will hurt his self-esteem or self-respect. You and your husband should learn to disagree with respect if you want to stay together, and if things start to get out of control, your marriage will start to fall apart, so be aware if that.
if you’re very serious about your marriage and you’re very concerned things will get out of your control, you should seek professional help, just do not thinks a marriage problem will get fixed by itself, this is a big mistake. If you’re looking for a professional that will help you deal with an angry husband and a lot of things that will help you live a successful and happy marriage, I highly recommend you to check Mort Fertel Marriage Fitness Program, one of the best and popular marriage-saving program on the internet, you don’t need to go the office, he will help solve your marriage problems from the comfort of your home, his success rate is very high, it exceeds 90% which you will not find anywhere else, this man knows what he does and he helped a lot of people get through their marriage difficulties and save their marriage, and they thank him for that on his website, you can check the testimonials and see what other people say about his services.
- Learn to say sorry: This is not an out of the box act, This is the only logical step that should be taken if you are the one who knows that this argument could’ve been avoided and it happened because of you then you should also have the audacity to accept in front of your husband and apologize to him. Make sure you sound honest and sincere because both of these things make the apology high in worth.
- Good Eating Habits: In this era of fast food, We all are slaves of the burgers and fries which indeed are the worst things to eat because they don’t have any nutrients and Nutrients. Deficient food makes your husband angry. You may have heard this saying: “We are What we eat” and trust me it is true. Make food for him which has a balanced nutrient diet and it also food that doesn’t make his body lazy and mind rush.
Tips to deal with an angry and moody husband?
- Don’t get involved in his mess: Whenever your husband is angry, just don’t be angrier in return or even a little angry. Don’t you want to be the person who is appreciated at the end when things get better, Don’t you want to listen to words of praise you will have when your husband will realize that he was not doing the right thing and still you didn’t get into it and always tried to help. It’s challenging but worth it in the end.
- Perceive when to leave: Its really a personal choice that when you think you have enough of his mess, you should think of moving on because this is something that you don’t want to ruin your life into. Just make sure you give your best shot before leaving because it will be a regret that you didn’t try enough for the person you vowed to love. Always keep in mind that when is the right time to stop tolerating as it will be somewhere in the middle of tolerating too much and compromising nothing.
- Reflection is Cure: The only way by which you can handle this situation is understanding the law of reflection that everything has an origin, many philosophers in the east have studied the anger deeply. My favorite Quote is of the buddha: “By looking deeply you’ll be able to identify the reasons that led to the person’s anger. If you see that you bear responsibility for angering the person, you’ll accept that your misconduct contributed to their anger and won’t get angry in exchange. If you are without blame, then you can try to see why that person has misinterpreted you. Then you can find a way to help him understand your true motives. By doing this, you are going to stay clear of causing more suffering to oneself and the other person.”
- Compassion is important: You should keep this thing in mind that only by being kind and compassionate towards each other, you both can drive a change. Kindness work wonders, I have seen many stones of heart melt by the heat of compassion and kindness. Once you will start practicing it, your husband will automatically affect him by your behavior and he will be inspired to be humble and kind.