My Wife Cheated On Me Should I Forgive Her or Divorce Her
My wife cheated on me should I forgive her or file for a divorce? This is the first question that comes into mind when you are faced with the reality of your spouse cheating on you.
To fall out of love is easier than falling in love, however, it may take a few weeks after marriage, months, and even in some cases years.
However, falling out of love’s main and most painful reason could be finding out that your wife cheated on you.
It doesn’t matter how hard you believe that your wife can not cheat on you and even if you are keen on ignoring any stories from friends of their wives cheating on them, trust me it can happen. It is for real!
My wife cheated on me should I forgive her or file for a divorce?
So, has your wife finally confronted her infidelity to you or you have put two and two together and are now sure that evenings that she was missing on dinner, she wasn’t with her friends but with her lover. Or those gifts that she claimed were from her office colleagues were gifts she got over secret dates.
Below are some of the tips and tricks that you should do on finding your wife has been cheating on you.
Do not confront your wife right after the affair
It is never a good idea to confront your wife right on and ask her straight out whether she has been disloyal to you or not. You may also want to walk to the man she was having an affair with and punch him hard right across his face. But trust me, this is not the right approach, you should handle things with more dignity and respect. Reaching out to them in a state of extreme anger can worsen your situation, it might even end you up in jail if things get physical. Therefore, confronting them should be last on your list. Read this article about questions to ask when confronting a cheating spouse.
Take some time and try to talk to her calmly. Ask her about her feelings and try to analyze things out. Understand her feelings and see how far she seems in this relationship. Ask her what made her take this step and where does she sees this relationship in the future. Ask her what you can do to make things better and is it possible for you to get her back.
Think about the future of your children
Knowing your partner has been unfaithful to you can make your world shatter within some minutes.
Now, it’s time for you to relax after the obvious breakdown and reconsider this situation again and again so that you can decide on what to do next with your life. Think hard about how this action from the wife is going to affect your kids because no matter what, she stays the mother of your kids. Remember that in the long run, it would be neither you nor your wife who would be affected the most from this decision but your kids, so act wisely, so that whatever the outcome is, it’s best for your kids.
Control your emotions and decide wisely
The most horrible nightmare has appeared true. When you find out that your wife is having an affair, it raises negative emotions in you but doesn’t let those emotions to direct you. Neither hide your emotions nor let them burst out like a volcano. You can recognize and express your strong feelings by controlling them. Think for a while and then decide. Don’t make decisions when you’re angry because such a decision will make you regret it. Most of the time the wives who cheated their husbands understood after a few months that they made a mistake and come back to their husbands pleading. It is easy to change if you are considerate. Put yourself in her place and act in a way you would think about her as if both of you were changed places. You can describe a “Loveless Marriage” as a situation where two people swore to live together happily have come to a condition…
My wife cheated on me and now she is pregnant now what?
It’s very disturbing when you find out that your wife has committed adultery. There would be no difficulty in getting separated if this happens in the first few months of the marriage because you haven’t decided to start a family at that time and nothing is on stake. The situation would be very difficult to handle if such a thing happens when you have been in a marriage for a long time and decided to spend life together as a family.
It is lovely when you fall in love and started a relationship as a married couple and having a child together is great. It is the most amazing feeling in the world when you get to know that you are going to be a father but what if this news comes with similar bad news. What was your reaction when one day you hear about your baby and the next day you find about the disloyalty of your wife? What would you do? This is what you must do.
- Ask Yourself why your wife cheated on you in the first place
As love makes you do senseless things, pregnancy does the same. During pregnancy, a woman goes through many things and she needs continuous assurance from her husband. If she is not getting adequate love and attention from her husband she can think about dodging him. There are two possibilities: either pregnancy causes betrayal or betrayal causes pregnancy. It doesn’t matter what’s the issue but you only have two options now: wait for the end of the affair and stay in marriage or file for a divorce. If you think the reason is the lack of attention and love by you that she needs, then you need to change your behavior and act correctly. Once you meet the needs and desires she wants things will get better.
- Reevaluate your relationship status
It depends on the type of relationship you two have when at the same time your wife is having adultery and is pregnant, what to do in such a situation. If you both know each other for a long time, spent time together, and ultimately fallen in love, got married and expecting a baby then you should give some time to your relationship. Consider all the factors that could have taken both of you in a situation where your wife regardless of being pregnant, is also willing to have a physical relationship with another man.
But still, if you love your wife and want her back in your life, they try to do the following things:
Try to be more reasonable and set accurate goals because there is no room for mistakes this time.
If you were not loyal and honest before, try to be now. Because in many cases it’s tit for tat. You have heard some women saying, “I cheated on him while I was pregnant because my husband cheated on me when I was pregnant.”
If she is having your child, don’t give up easily. It would be difficult but what isn’t. Dr. Todd Creager, a Licensed marriage therapist said that no relationship is going to be easy whether it’s your ex or someone new. If you put much effort maybe your wife realizes that this relationship is worthy and give it a chance.
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Read our Marriage Fitness Program review by Mort Fertel and how Chris was able to revive his marriage following Mort Fertel’s program.
- Get done with Predictable
In the worst circumstances, divorce would be the last option in any situation. Go for divorce even though she is pregnant if you have tried everything to convince her but nothing appears to work. If she wanted to bring up the unborn child with you, she wouldn’t have done this. She must have thought about the child she is having, maybe the child is not even yours.
At this time get some legal help because now the marital assets and custody of baby are involved.
Go for the DNA test to prove that the child is yours or not, understand the rights of your legal divorce. It is difficult to keep or let the child go but you should be prepared for anything that comes in your way. If you the child is yours and you don’t want your infidel wife and her love to raise your child, then be prepared to raise him alone.
Cheating on your spouse is not forgivable. Whether the husband or wife commits it, it leaves the other partner distressed. You swore to be together in the ups and downs of your life till death and now this happens. But this is life and it discloses matters in its own sweet and bitter ways.
Finally, the conclusion is: Both of you are free to live your lives in your way and nobody can halt you in doing so. Feel fresh and get over infidelity feelings because you deserve that.