How Long Does It Take For An Ex To Miss You After A Breakup ?
in this article, we will answer your question: how long does it take for an ex to miss you after a breakup?. It’s as simple as that, buddy! You need to stop missing him and move on for him to realize what he lost and start missing you again. That may sound harsh to you, but remember the last few weeks you two were together? Well, that was the time when your partner was slowly going away from you, mentally as well as emotionally. It might come across as a surprise for you but it’s something that your partner has been planning for a while.
However, if you know him/her well, you can’t miss out on small things that indicate where your relationship is headed towards and that a breakup is soon on the road. To look into the psyche of your ex, understand that because this is not sudden for him, it’s not that painful for him or he is not going to feel guilty even if you try to make him. As he already has logic justified in his head for everything. They have gone for weeks and suffered anxiety and shattered confidence just thinking how would you react.
And now is your turn. We all know that the dumpees always has it bad, many people can never walk away and forget whatever happened to them. They are so emotionally attached that they can’t even imagine being separated from their loved ones. They suffer from separation anxiety as well as lost confidence and self-esteem. It can take up to years until they can put away their ex’s abandoning them and start thinking about themselves and their well-being. Rejection sucks and, unfortunately, the dumpers get to walk away before getting the taste of their own medicine. But that’s how things work in a relationship, those who care are hurt and those who don’t- do not get hurt…
We all know how unfair the breakup is and how harsh it is for the dumpee but it’s not going take us anywhere. Those who want to cheat and dump you, will, at any cost and any expense. I mean what good would this do to you in the long run or even short run thinking that your partner has done a bad virtue and he isn’t improving as a person…?
The more mature thing to do would be to give and seek your love somewhere else, where it’s valued and you are valued.
But only if you are wondering, okay so now what? He cheated and moved on. I got dumped and healed and moved on as well. That’s it? I mean is he never going to realize what he lost? Is he never going to repeat what he did to someone he once loved?
So yeah to find your answer, read on!
How Long Does It Take For an Ex To Miss You?
Your ex would rarely start missing you right after he/she walks out of the house. They might miss the good memories that you two made together or any accomplishment that you two achieved as a couple but other than that, your partner is just way too busy minding his own business and spending time with their new partner. Had they really missed you or loved you so much, they would be there with you assuring you throughout and not dump you to be with someone else.
The way love and respect work in life is simple, the more you give, the more you get. So if your ex is not with you, it’s very obvious that he does not see you good enough to be loved or given respect that’s required. In their plans, you are not a part of it.
Therefore, you need to make sure that you don’t fall for their words but understand their actions and draw an answer from it. Actions are the key that would explain everything, whether your ex misses you, doesn’t care about you or even hate you. You have got to read them objectively.
If you are still confused about your ex’s behavior and are not sure what to make out of his actions, you can ask the other readers on this page who can give you honest opinions as they know nothing about you neither about your ex. So their opinion can lead you to extract an answer.
Why Suffer Before Realization?
Because when he was with you, he had already made up his mind that you two are not compatible with each other and that he deserves something else or even something better than you. Whenever you were with him/her, they were always surrounded by negative energy that clouded their mind and stopped them to think anything nice about you.
What caused that negative vibe for you around them was their bad and poor thinking pattern and then emotions that empowered their negative thinking pattern.
What happened was that even on trying, your ex couldn’t improve his perception and the way he thinks about you, therefore giving a boost to the negative energy each passing day. And only when it reached its peak and your ex could no longer hold it in himself, he let it take control and gave up on you.
Your ex might have discussed with you or have told you about that negative energy and how it was making everything complex and confusing for them for even for years.
I’m sorry to break it to you, but there is nothing that you can do to make them regret abandoning you just because that negative energy is still very high, blocking any emotional feelings to reach to him and make him miss you.
Therefore, sticking to plan B and letting what’s not in your control take charge on its own and get through your ex’s negative barriers.
It may sound logical yet mean, but the only way to make your ex miss you is to wait for energy stronger than the negative energy of you to take its toll and give him a taste of his medicine.
So, for your ex to miss you, he would have to go through these horrible feelings;
- Put their guards down in terms of ego
- Get hurt by someone else
- See things with a different perspective
- Get a reality check and process GIGS
- Get dumped
Put it simply, for your ex to realize what they have lost and started missing you again, the negative energy barrier would have to be broken by a stronger opponent. You will have to wait for something bad happening to them by their new partner.
When Your Ex Says I Miss You
If your ex comes back to you and tells you that he has realized the grave mistake that they made and wants to be back in your life, don’t give in and tell him that you miss them too no matter how bad you want to be back in their life. Because honestly, your ex does not deserve you anymore and especially if he has shown up only after getting deceived or hurt by their new partner. This only entails that even if you patch up with them for a while, there is no assuredness that they won’t leave you again for this day.
In this way, you can deliver the moral lesson your ex need and continue with their life without you and search for their love.
Don’t put them off just by saying, “I don’t miss you” or “Go away from here” and stuff like that. Instead, interrogate him fully as he will be more than willing to answer all of your questions and it will help you console knowing all the answers after all.
Ask them what happened? Why are they back and not with their partners they went to? They might have come back due to the guilt of leaving and abandoning you or because they have been dumped.
It’s unlikely that they would tell you what went wrong, instead, they would just insist on getting back with you because they have realized their mistake. If they find you even a bit lenient and detect that you still carry emotional feelings for them, they will make sure to not give you the truth and just make you feel that they love you and value you so much,
Therefore, it is important to not discern what happened to your ex instead of discerning what they want from you. The more empowered you present yourself in front of your ex, the better. If your ex is telling you the truth and want you back in their life and that’s exactly what you want, then you should take charge this time. Make sure he knows that this time around you are going to set the rules and they will be who would follow it.
Dumpers Missing Their Exes
It is possible but very rare. There are genuinely very few people who care about their ex-partner even when they decide to move away from them. I’m a professional who has been studying the dumpers’ behavior and I must say that I very seldom come across those dumpers (hardly 5%) who give a damn about their struggling partner.
It’s not their fault and they don’t have to be real-time villains to have dumped you. Instead, they are just normal people who might be very caring and great, they often get impatient about their past relationship and tend to adopt the mentality of a victim and thus react accordingly.
Maybe it’s linked with their upbringing or age, but I have seen that people above the age of 40 show more maturity in their decision than those younger. They are emphatic people who have experienced being dumped once in their life and knows exactly how bad it is when your ex kicks you out and replace with you with someone else so they show a very soft and empathetic attitude towards the partners they are dumping.
You can say they have enough self-control, knowledge and personal experience to do the right thing. Some dumpers do not dump you just because they don’t find you good enough, instead, some people become dumpers due to their intense depression fits, unhappiness with the current situation, or simply because their parents refuse their love. These people are surely not very dismaying as they are not happy to leave you behind but are helpless and have no choice but to leave you and seek their happiness with someone else.
The dumper’s behavior after the breakup depends solely on anxiety and stress they link with their ex-partner. If it’s too much for your dumpee partner, they might as well start hating you for reasons that are outside their control.
But the kind of attitude dumpers exhibits to their dumpee after the breakup depends on how much stress and anxiety they associate with the dumpee.
You would find them bread-crumbing their feelings for their dumpee partner and appreciate their personality traits for months and even for years.
Why Is My Ex Telling Me That He/She Misses Me?
If your ex comes to you and spills his heart about how he misses you and then disappear shortly after, few reasons justify their behavior;
- To come out of their guilt
- Using their ex for validating every wrong
- To keep you strung and attached for a longer time.
If you are wondering when your ex is going to realize that they miss you, the answer to that is when they want you in their life back. So wait for something bad to happen on their end which would let them start feeling positive about you and your personality again, making them miss you and wanting you back in their life.
You should be smart enough to not come under their trap if they say that they miss you and are still with their new partner because for them to miss you, they have to miss the part you played in the relationship and all those benefits you provided to your ex.
Another trap they can try to put you in is that they tell you that they don’t know what they are doing and they are confused and can’t make up their mind. Just know that they are lying and are making things up. All they want is a guilt-free pre-breakup state which looks calmer and settled out than the mess created. There is nothing that can stop a lover from reaching up to their love.
Therefore, actions speak louder than words. Pay close attention to their actions rather than what they are saying.
Dumpers Don’t Miss Their Ex
This may burst your bubble of getting your ex back, but remember, your ex left you for a reason and they don’t want to do anything with you as they are busy enjoying the life they dumped you for. It is very painful but true, that most of the dumpers don’t care about their ex-partners and how they are suffering. Some couples get into the friend zone after breaking up, but mostly it’s either love or war.
If your ex shows no sign of missing you or wanting you back in their life, your ex is likely to be over you as they have made a conscious decision to leave you on your own. If anything, the only element remaining is respect and that too if your ex-partner was not immature and you didn’t end up begging and pleading them to stay.
Even that element of respect can vanish into thin air if you don’t let your partner process the breakup at their own pace.
If Your Ex Misses You, You Will Hear From Them
If your ex shows up out of nowhere and starts apologizing for stuff like;
- Not speaking to you or ignoring you
- Spreading false rumors about you
- Cheating on you
- Their behavior with you after the breakup
Know that they are bread-crumbing at the cost of your feelings once again and they want to extort some kind of information from you which would then give them self-confidence, strength, and assurance. Therefore, be extra careful if this happens, as them trying this could solely indicate they are looking for any space from you which can provide them the benefit to their emotional weaknesses.
You can judge this through observing for any nostalgia stage of their breakup and shows genuine signs of regret for dumping you.
Remember that your ex will depict genuine signs of concern and care if they miss you and try to crawl back into your life, keep a close watch whether they are there to take from you, or to be with you.
Should I Text My Ex Boyfriend or Girlfriend When I Miss Them?
As the one who has been cheating on and ditched on, you should not text your ex. Leaving desperate voice notes or posting vague quotes on Facebook isn’t a good idea either. As your ex is no more in a relationship with you, they don’t want to know about you or your whereabouts or how bad you miss them.
They want to be separated from you and that entails moving on with leaving everything behind.
However, if you are the dumper and you have started missing your ex, even then you should not text your ex. It would leave you and the partner you dumped nowhere. If anything, it would reopen the wounds and make them analyze your text for infinity.
So keep your emotions and your thoughts to yourself and if you don’t plan to patch things up with them, don’t text them. Let them heal from the damage your breakup has caused.
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